Belligerence And Debauchery, "The Others" Style.
Part Tres: The Trip Home.
More specifically, "The Morning After", and The Drunk Dial That Rocked My World.

Z's alarm went off at 8, but no one dumped me off of my air mattress until after 8:30. I decided against a shower, but instead opted to slap on my newly-purchased Miss America cap and a smile. After a quick cleaning of the suite, we zipped to the elevator to head downstairs to check out.

About halfway down, the doors opened and a bachelor party stumbled in. Helloooo, boys! One was a riot, he and his Yankees cap. (Insert A.D.D.-raddled observation here: Do all the cuties wear Yankees caps? Hmm. Ponderous.) Anyhow, I asked them if they knew if the Irish had won yesterday, and of course they did. Then, the conversation turned to the Bucks. Miata, being of the OSU Alumna persuasion, was thrilled that they won. One of the boys then ratted out his buddy for being a lame-ass pansy-boy Michigan fan. This resulted in a resounding chorus of "FUCK MICHIGAN!" from the rest of the elevator occupants.

After we got out, I drove Mombi over to get her car at Sands. Loaded up the CR-V to leave, and Mombi was still MIA. A, and JK went with me to track her down. Oh, and we stopped at 7-11 on the way back by. Hey man, a gal's just gotta have a Slurpee sometimes! We loaded up on sugary things (but NOT the citrus Listerine pocket paks ... those taste like ASS, as we discovered on Saturday), and wandered back out to the CR-V. Waved at the drunk guy holding up the wall, and zipped off to wait for Mombi. As we pulled in, we saw L sitting outside with our stuff. She was all snuggled up in a blanket, just waiting patiently on the bench. Just about then, two uber cutie surfer boys walk by and flirt shamelessly with her. Hell yeah, Sista L still got GAME, baby!

We realized that we should probably stop to get gas on the way out of town, so we pulled off at the Sunoco station just off of the AC Expressway. I turned on my phone and dialed into my voice mail, and it said "you have ... one ... unheard message. First message ..."

MEOW, MEOW, MEOW, MEOW
MEOW, MEOW, MEOW, MEOW
*thump*
MEOW, MEOW, MEOW, MEOW
MEOW, MEOW, MEOW, MEOW
*snicker*
MEOW. MEOW. MEEEEOWWWW!
*click*

This is particularly amusing when said in a slurring state of intoxication (and a v. charming Southern accent). Of course, I giggled and hit "rewind" ... and passed the phone around in the car to The Others so that they could hear. It was at that exact moment that it dawned on me ... (in my best American Teen Princess voice) awww crap. I'm smitten. I'm not sure why, at that exact point and that specific place, it hit me that R was right, and that I needed to start letting someone "in". Maybe it was because I thought nothing of sharing something so trite with everyone else, and that's generally not my MO.

Fast-forward an hour and a half. We're sitting stopped at a dead standstill in Philly. What the hell? It's Sunday afternoon! Where are all these jackoffs coming from? This sucked up any extra time we had, and totally shot the fleeting idea of stopping at Miata's homeland (AKA, the IKEA store in King Of Prussia). She was very very sad.

Somehow, and I'm not sure how this happened, but we lost Mombi's car. I think they missed the I-80 turnoff, because they ended up being about 100 miles out of their way. Whoops. So we went on our merry way through the mountains of PA, and waited for them to catch up.

Somewhere near Clarion, we started whining that we were hungry. I mused that we really could use some Taco Bell ... and VOILA, there was one. The heavens parted. Angels sang. And it was good. BUT - it was an "express". Curses! We pulled through the drive-thru, and it was actually a full-menu affair! Happy happy joy joy! So we ordered $16 worth of TB for the four of us (that's a lot of taco bell, and we weren't even drunk), and we were on our way. A, who is the quiet type, occasionally has fits of comic genius. And here's one of hers from the trip home:

* rolls down window *
H: A, what's up? Why ya rollin down the window? Want me to turn on the air?
A: tee hee ... you know that Taco Bell we just ate? Well. It just may have given me a little ... gas.

This sends the CR-V into fits of laughter.

7:45 PM: We call Mombi's car. Z is driving. Our lead has closed to merely 45 miles. We only stopped for five minutes, and we've been doing about 80 mph.

8:15 PM: We arrive at Z's house. We call. They are in Kent (about 30 minutes away). Z must still be driving.

8:40 PM: They arrive at Z's house. We load up cars, and head on home.

9:30 PM: I leave my mom and dad's house to drive home to mine. Call TheBoy on the way home and chat him up. Really, it was only to keep me awake. OK, so maybe I missed talking to him. Guilty as charged.

11:45 PM: I arrive home in Cow-Town, put Princess in bed, and unpack. And by "unpack", I mean "unzip my suitcase, dump it on the living room floor, take my pill, and go to bed".

EPILOGUE:

There were a few missing key elements from this little weekend. One, most glaringly obvious, being MAV. That's OK, because we'll make up for it soon I'm sure.

It is unknown whether or not AM is still talking to MOB. Rumor has it that he got to second base.

After receiving The Drunk Dial That Rocked My World, I'm currently working on scheduling time for TheBoy to meet The Others. (More on this in a future installment.) As it stands right this minute, it is possible that I will do it in small doses. We are quite overwhelming in a large group, after all.

Next debaucherous trip with The Others is coming soon to a city near you. Maybe it will be Miss Ohio USA ... God help the neighborhood.