Doesn't this seem random? Hopelessly random?
(bonus points to anyone that can identify where the title came from ...)
Been a while since I had one of these "random rants" kind of posts. The last one I can recall was the "why do we have name-brand eggs, as they all come from the asses of chickens" one. So, for your reading (and commenting) pleasure ... here we go. If you have anything to add, please comment appropriately. I like comments, they make me feel good, and loved, and needed, and stuff.. Almost as good as a nice shiny quarter ...
1. Since when did the demons at Verizon Wireless decide that it was OK to eliminate my detailed billing? Did they think that I just wouldn't notice? I mean, there are only a few people that I actually call from my cell phone during a month's time, maybe 20. But for some reason, one of my "most expensive calls" was to Provo, Utah. Umm, I don't know *anyone* in Provo, Utah. I'd like to get my hands on this number, because the thought of my calling there just makes absolutely no sense to me. But I'm not motivated enough to actually call Verizon's "Customer Dis-service" number, because I don't feel like sitting on hold for an hour. This troubles me greatly.
2. McDonald's now takes credit cards. This shoots multiple holes in my "but I can't get an Egg McMuffin value meal for breakfast ... I don't have any cash on me" theory. I can just feel the size of my ass growing by the minute. I might as well just invest in a better bike, as I'm about to spend copious amounts of time riding it. Speaking of bikes ...
3. There is a number three today. Why are bike helmets so stupid-looking? I mean, I wear one when I ride because I am not particularly coordinated, and I think that I have a good amount of guilt on me if I don't wear one. But great googly moogly, they are fugly. It looks like someone put one of those foam ice chests on my head and secured it with rubber bands. Now, in all reality, will that really stop my brain from spilling forth from my nostrils if I get ran over by a huge SUV?
4. Semi-annual performance reviews are the silliest thing I think I've ever dealt with. TheFirm implemented this fun little torture strategy, and they are really reinforcing it this year. I, of course, received "Exceeds Expectations" in several areas. While this gives me the warm fuzzies and all, it sure don't pay for the new lingerie in my drawer. If you are going to make us have a semi-annual review, then you should give us a semi-annual raise.
5. Along with Murphy, I rejoice in the fact that school's about to start back up. I relish my leisurely walks around Easton in the late summer afternoons, and they are currently marred by little yuppie children kvetching at their parents to buy them the overly priced junior-whore clothes (of underwhelming quality) that Forever XXI has to offer. Allow me to get a smoothie or a latte (half 2% and half soy, please) and mill about in peace, stop making me wander up to my only place of solace in Easton Station (Bar Louie) to get some respite.
12:45 EDIT: I'm super duper bored. My boss is off today, her boss is off today, and it's pretty much just organized chaos around here. NewBoy has been absent today. I'm not in the mood to deal with J today (yes, he's still around in a very limited sense ... limited to my voice mail, that is ... how did I ever live without caller ID at my desk). I'm not meant to work today, it's 68* and sunny outside. Amuse me, please.
Quote of the day, from Girlfriend: "I need a new scale. I don't like the one I have. I have to bend down to see the numbers, and that sucks because I weigh more when I bend over."
3:00 PM EDIT: Viva La Weekend! ... In an interesting turn of events ... I have NOTHING to do this weekend. The Princess is going to stay with her grandparents from Friday evening until Sunday evening. The weather is supposed to be 75* and SUNNY on Saturday, and 77* and SUNNY on Sunday. What to do, what to do ...
4:18 PM EDIT: Weather Report and Disturbing Conversation Du Jour. Can you tell I'm really bored today?
Weather Report: Good thing Pete and his buddies are home from his little debaucherous trip to Florida ... apparently the weather gods are pissed that they cleaned out all of the liquor in the Ft. Lauderdale area. Two hurricanes at once ... yup, they are REALLY pissed.
Disturbing Conversation Du Jour: Per this afternoon's discussion with a very funny, very single, and very charming co-worker: there is a phrase that he and his buddies use to define relationships. "Home Ass and Away Ass". See, back in the day, he went to an out-of-state university and had a girlfriend there, but kept the girlfriend at home too. All the while, sleeping with both. (Before I go any farther, yes I know this was an HR Reprimand waiting to happen ... but ... he's really really really cute ... ) Now, I've only been "tamed" by one man in my life. Generally, I'm the "not getting tied down" type. Someday, I'll settle down again, when the right situation presents itself. For now, I'm enjoying the latitude that being single offers. Maybe I'm a prude, but I can't fathom actually SLEEPING with two men (or more) at the same time. Not only are there significant emotional consequences, I just have this bizarre nightmare of landing myself on Maury Povich, getting paternity tested. ..:: shudder ::..