at night i lay in bed
with static in my head


I couldn't sleep last night, I just kept tossing and turning in bed. I tried every trick in the book: the long pillow between the knees, the chamomile tea ... everything. And none of it worked. I'm not really worried about anything, I don't think. I didn't eat or drink anything that would have made me sleepless. I even spent some time on the phone with TheBoy last night, and as we all know ... this makes me happy. Consequently, I had absolutely NO reason why I should have been such an insomniac. Last time I looked at the clock, it was well after 1:00 AM. My alarm went off way too early this morning. Well, it went off at the same time it always does, but it just FELT early.

So, after smashing the snooze button twice, I stumbled downstairs to make myself a pot of coffee (as I only do when I'm really super tired). Coffee maker? Check. Coffee filters? Check. Coffee? Umm, no dice. I'm out of coffee. I nearly had a meltdown in the middle of the kitchen. Of course, as I live alone, it was no one's fault but my own that I was out of coffee. I stomped back up the steps and stood in the shower for a good 15 minutes, hoping it would jolt me into reality. I'm out of my "energizing" body wash ... have to go and buy some more this afternoon. Anyways, all the shower did was make me smile (after I was able to open my eyes completely) when I noticed my newly remounted shower curtain rod. Mental note: clear calendar for TheBoy. And be quick about it.

Today is going by fairly quickly. I'm working on reconciling control procedures with our self-assessments, then re-writing either document appropriately to make them match up. In English, this entails chasing people down to share information with me that they should have delivered more than a week ago. I mused to TheCubeMate that they should just make a cattle prod a "standard issue" item in our department. Either that, or a spork. (reference my "TURN. YOUR. SHIT. IN. ON. TIME. THEN. I. WON'T. HAVE. TO. SPORK. YOU." tirade from a few weeks ago.)

Speaking of TheCubeMate: The Rebel Phase's brother was a no-show (but not a no-call) for Saturday. Martinis are in order, tomorrow nite. Bar Louie, of course. I'm about to be the pretty boys' pimp. This should make me feel dirty, but instead I think it gives me an odd sense of pride.

Ah well, off to go and yell at people some more.

PS: I posted this via e-mail. Sorry if some of the formatting is jacked up, I'll have to fix it later tonight.

8:09 PM EDIT: And in case you didn't notice ... I fixed the formatting.